My mom adventures in Fort Collins

On being a stay-at-home-mom

Me and my husband, Thanksgiving 2011. Photo by Scout

I am a mom, like a few billion women out there. I do distinguish that I am a “stay-at-home-mom” simply because this is presently my situation, and I’m devoting time to it every day. Though I couldn’t always say this, I’ve come to see being a stay-at-home mom as a vocation. It’s a chapter in my life that I have embraced.

The decision to do what’s best for your family is one that every parent makes every day. For me, it was this driving force that determined our present family situation: my husband works full-time and I am a stay-at-home mom. Unlike other stay-at-home moms that I have met, I do not work outside the home, nor do I work inside the home for money. I have not been given a paycheck since December 2008. I don’t sell Arbonne, I won’t watch other people’s children for pay, or pick up a few shifts at Whole Foods for the discount. I have considered all of these options because I am a restless, indecisive soul. Yet, I always come back to this realization: “This is what I do.” And it is enough.

I spend time with my kids, make meals, run errands, take care of household chores, keep on top of appointments, do the shopping, and otherwise take care of business here at home. Occasionally, we enjoy playdates with our friends. Sometimes I like to craft, sew or bake. Frequently, I’m dropping off, picking up or working at our co-op pre-school. My butt might indicate otherwise, but I try to go to the gym. And every day, around noon, we have lunch as a family because my work-from-home hubby can walk down the stairs from his office and enjoy a few minutes with us. This is my stay-at-home life, and I feel blessed to have it.

I don’t see being at home with my kids as controversial. This is not about me taking some moral high ground. Personally, I do not get worked up or judgemental about parenting decisions like: Breast or bottle, cloth diaper or disposable, work or stay-home. As with most everything, I rarely see either/or decisions in life. I also understand that it is a privilege to even have a choice. Many people don’t. Naturally, I have opinions about being a stay-at-home-mom. There are reasons that I decided to do this, and I don’t expect that others would understand them nor would they make the same choices. Let me be clear that I do very much respect the working-mom. I was a working mom for the first 18 months with my oldest.

But for me this is a vocation. Probably not one that I will be able to do forever, but  it’s a great choice for us while our children are young. I am gratefully unemployed doing the hardest job of my life.


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[…] On being a stay-at-home-mom […]

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Comment by gina

Aw, thanks, Gina!

Comment by jaymers

So glad to see you’re doing well (I found you from Juana & Yessica’s new-ish blogs). Your girls are beautiful!

Comment by bunchesofjoy

Thanks, dearie! Just saw this. I have checked out the happenings of the Bunches fam for a while, gonna have to do that!

Comment by jaymers

I loved when you wrote “This is not about me taking some morral high ground”. I have some friends see staying at home as some sort of political stance. Then they use that stance to bash parents who don’t stay at home. I believe you communicated your thoughts so perfectly!

Comment by thestayathomefeminist

Thanks so much for reading! I actually wrote this a while ago, I should revisit and see if everything still rings true for me, right??? Thanks for finding my blog, I just found yours, too!

Comment by jaymers

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